Now, when I hold my daughter, I find it
hard to believe how long I waited for this moment.
Five-and-a-half years ago, my husband & I got married.
We didn't want children right away, since my husband
was still in the army and we wanted to wait until we
had enough money to start thinking about an apartment.
In retrospect, I don't know what one has to do with
the other, but back then we thought it was important.
Our parents (both sets!) started asking us, "so..."
just about at our wedding (so as in "so when are
you going to have a baby?") For some odd reason
they expected me to come back from our honeymoon with
me being four months pregnant -- even though we only
spent a week there. My mother met us at the airport
& was eyeing my stomach as if she expected to see
something. We were married all of two weeks at the time...
Anyway, back to the story. I had always been somewhat
overweight. I started high school weighing close to
160 and by the time I got married, my weight was nearing
190. My husband reminded me constantly that he loves
me just the way I am & I didn't mind lying on the
bed to try to slip on skin-tight jeans. True, I had
always wanted to lose weight, but I guess I never had
After my husband got out of the army & found a
job, we felt more financially secure. I went off the
pill & we used condoms for another three months...
or at least we decided to... after about twice we gave
up & decided that we didn't really care what happened.
My doctor said it wasn't important to take a break before
getting pregnant anyway.
I wasn't thinking about it much and then I suddenly
realized that I'd gone off the pill before Christmas
& it was almost Valentine's day & I still hadn't
gotten my period. I I realized I must be pregnant, so
I got a home pregnancy test just to be sure. I waited
a loooooooooooong minute & there was a line... one
line... Huh? I wasn't pregnant? I waited another week
and my period finally came. I figured my period must
be irregular because I'd gone off the pill. The next
cycle, I paid more attention & my period came after
62 days. How was I going to get pregnant like that?!?
I made an appointment.
My doctor said we hadn't been trying for a whole year
& that he couldn't help us. He didn't even send
me for any tests.
So we waited a tear and nothing happened. I switched
doctors and the doctor sent me for tests. It turned
out that I had PCOS
(polycystic ovarian syndrome). My hormones were out-of-whack
and that was what was causing my irregular periods.
The doctor gave me a prescription for clomid and said
that should help get my cycle on track. My period did
come more regularly but I didn't get pregnant. After
a few months, the doctor said we should try IUI
When we went to do our first (and only) actual infertility
treatment - IUI, we discovered that my husband's sperm
count was low. I thought it strange that they hadn't
done a sperm
analysis earlier, but I guess they never considered
we might both have fertility problems. They told us
that it wasn't critical, but that with our combined
problems we should realize that it was really unlikely
that we'd get pregnant naturally. The IUI failed.
Surprisingly, what ended up helping us was something
totally unexpected. I was really depressed because of
the failed treatment. My best friend, Annie, took me
out for a cup of coffee and somehow, really tactfully,
told me that she thought that my being overweight could
be affecting my fertility.
Coming from anyone else, I would have taken that really
badly, but she's all heart and I knew she only wanted
what was best for me. I started to read up on it &
realized she could be right. I made an appointment with
a dietician and I started to diet seriously for the
first time in my life. I asked her how much weight I
needed to lose & she said, "about 30 pounds,
for a start". In the first month, I lost 4 pounds
& realized it was going to take forever. I stopped
hoping something would happen and put all my efforts
into my diet. After 4 months I had lost 20 pounds and
I noticed that even without medication my cycles were
getting shorter - 35 days, 37 days... After 6 months,
I had lost 26 pounds. I made an appointment & the
doctor sent me for tests to see if there had been any
change in my hormone balance.
Three days later I got a call from the doctor's office
saying that I need to do one more test. I was scared
something was really wrong, so I sent my husband to
get the slip I needed for the lab. It said bHCG on it,
which I immediately knew was a pregnancy test. Could
my doctor think I was pregnant??? The following afternoon,
I had my answer. I was pregnant. I didn't have any symptoms
or anything. It was a complete surprise.
And now my little baby is here with me :-).