Surrogacy - Questions to Ask a Surrogate Mother

Deciding to have a surrogate mother carry your baby is sometimes the only option for having a biological child. The decision and process are seldom easy and involve a lot of doubts and questions.

Here are some questions you might want to ask a potential gestational surrogate (questions for a traditional surrogate would include more details on genetics):

Pregnancies & Medical History

How many pregnancies has she had?

Has she had any miscarriages?

What is her medical history, particularly in terms of previous pregnancies or illnesses that could affect pregnancy (e.g., diabetes)?

Does she take any medications? If so, which?

Being a Surrogate

Is this her first surrogacy?

Why did she decide to become a surrogate?

What do her family members & close friends feel about her decision – are they supportive?

What is her fee and what other expenses does she expect you to pay, ie: travel, childcare, household help, maternity clothes, life insurance (how much), lost work days, etc. What fees (if any) are covered by her medical insurance?


Does she (and has she ever) use drugs?

Is she a drinker? Will she drink alcohol during the pregnancy?

Does she smoke? Will she avoid second-hand smoke?

Pregnancy & Delivery

How many babies is she willing to carry? What are her feelings about reduction?

What kind of relationship does she want with you before, during and after the pregnancy?

How will she feel about your coming with her to doctor's visits, ultrasounds, etc.?

How will she feel about your being in the delivery room (both husband and wife)?

What decisions does she want to be left up to her (e.g., medication during delivery, c-section vs. vaginal delivery)?

Will she be interested to know about your child as s/he grows?

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